The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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