Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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