Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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