Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Randomize
