She said her name was "party"
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize
