hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
