The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I love you. Go after that dick
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize