Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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