I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
We had sex on a dog bed..
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
