brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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