I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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