I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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