i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
