Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Randomize
