Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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