yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Randomize
