did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize