Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(773): View more from Illinois

I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it

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(206): View more from Washington

I think I have vodka in my lungs

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay

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(406): View more from Montana

i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.

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(562): View more from California

I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?

(714): View more from California

Whatever it is you failed

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(585): View more from New York

You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!

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(661): View more from California

he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".

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(406): View more from Montana

Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression

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