I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
