When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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