Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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