Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry 1bzchika hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(718): View more from New York

Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up

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(201): View more from New Jersey

i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around

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(630): View more from Illinois

hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?

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(970): View more from Colorado

I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.

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(248): View more from Michigan

Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.

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(845): View more from New York

My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...

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(281): View more from Texas

Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.

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(585): View more from New York

You get home okay?

(1-585): View more from New York

I'm pantless and in bed

(585): View more from New York

That doesn't mean you're at home.

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(205): View more from Alabama

It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview

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