we should wear snuggies to the strip club
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
