Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize