I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
