Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
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