She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize
