when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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