I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Randomize
