Well apparently he's into motor boating.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
