she was so not down for the gang bang
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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