we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
