1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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