I'm lost and stupid without you.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
