I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Randomize