Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
