Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
