I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I think I just sharted jello shots
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
