You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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