shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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