She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
