how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
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