You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
