no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
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