i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
