i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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