After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
