Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize
