Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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