Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
