he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
